Five Firsts
by ponderer
Summary: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.
1. Part the First

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: As always, read, review, and all that jazz. You have no idea how much your support means to me.

Five Firsts: Part the First

_The first second kiss._

Ron found her in the hospital wing helping Madame Pomfrey to mend all those wounded during the final battle of the Voldemort era. He had just come from Fred's bedside, done for the moment with mourning, in the search of something good, something to make him think of what he had fought for; Hermione. She was exhausted looking and it wasn't just because of the battle and the fighting and finding out Harry had died but then that he was only faking and was really alive (_Bugger off Harry, for that one_). Hell, he was exhausted too, and nothing seemed more appetizing than taking a long hot shower and sleeping for at least a week, but then he saw Hermione and changed his mind.

"Do you need any help?" he murmured to her, coming from behind where she was currently bandaging up a sixth year Ravenclaw student that Ron couldn't recognize. Hermione sighed and turned to him and he wanted nothing more than to whisk her from the room and away from all the bad and make her smile again. But he knew that she wouldn't leave until she couldn't stand and he knew he wouldn't rest until she did.

"Yes, could you please hand me that vial by the bed?" she asked tiredly. She smiled though, a small one, but it was enough for now. Ron nodded and moved toward the vial Hermione asked for. He silently handed it to her and she went about and poured some into a goblet, handing it to the newly bandaged girl. "Drink this and you should sleep peacefully. Madame Pomfrey will be able to help you more when you wake up. For now, sleep and think of the morning sun," she whispered to the girl, moving her hair away from her forehead as the girl lay back on her pillows, heaving a sigh.

"Thank you," the girl muttered before a huge yawn erupted from her bloodied mouth. The potion Hermione had given her had already taken affect. Hermione nodded, standing there an extra moment, then, tucking the blanket around the girl, she went about cleaning up her small pile and moved to the large counter. Ron followed behind her faithfully.

"Have you eaten anything?" he asked her worriedly. Hermione shook her head no while putting all of the things away. Ron frowned. "The house-elves prepared sandwiches and hot soup downstairs for anyone who was hungry. I reckon Harry's down there with the lot of them. He was wondering where you were." This was only half a lie. He knew that if she thought Harry needed her, she would come faster than if Ron himself asked.

"He did not, Ronald. I know it's you that worried," Hermione said but Ron spotted her lips curling up slightly. She was pleased.

"Well, why don't you come down for a kip? I'm famished. Feels like I haven't had a decent meal in months." Hermione laughed and slapped him playfully on the shoulder.

"Are you saying something against my cooking capabilities?"

"Oh, not at all! I probably wouldn't enjoy it anyways, not with being so used to burnt mushrooms and undercooked fish." Hermione's smile was his reward to his joke, and he knew that she knew he was only half-joking. "Please, you should rest. We deserve it."

Hermione looked around the wing helplessly. "There's so much more to do, more that I can do here."

"What you need to do is come away from here and eat before you end up lying in a bed here too," he answered, grabbing onto her hand. It was the first physical contact they'd had since their earlier embrace and the feeling of her skin felt phenomenal. She flushed too, looking down at their clasped hands. In response, he tightened his hold and she looked up at him again. Her eyes were bloodshot and her face was caked with dirt and yet Ron had never seen anything so beautiful. He decided she needed to know, "You're so beautiful."

For the first time, Hermione didn't argue. She simply blushed and followed Ron's lead down to the Main Hall where many were eating. Harry was sitting beside Ginny, his hand on her thigh, hers on his shoulder. It looked awkward, because they were eating with their opposite hands, but they didn't seem to mind, kissing each other's lips every few moments because they could; finally. Hermione and Ron followed their lead and sat down across from them where dishes and bowls appeared in front of them.

Ron, as usual, made to dive in, but he saw Hermione break a small piece of bread off and nibble on it and changed his mind. First, he used the ladle to pour a large helping of soup into her bowl, then plucked half of a turkey sandwich onto her small plate. He looked at her pleadingly and with a small growl, she proceeded to take a bite into her sandwich, then as he watched, she took up speed and ate with such a force that Harry and Ginny took a moment away from each other's lips to gaze at her in wonder.

"What?" Hermione asked at their stares, a piece of lettuce falling from her lips. Ron didn't chuckle, but was pleased that she was eating so he made himself up a plate.

"How are you feeling?" Ginny asked him as she watched him blow on his soup filled spoon. He took a large slurp and groaned (it was chicken noodle, delicious!).

"Like I could sleep for ten years," he answered his little sister, smiling. He already couldn't wait to escape upstairs. Hermione and Harry nodded their agreement.

"I could sleep for ten years, although I think many would be disappointed," Harry admitted.

"I don't think anyone could be disappointed by what you did tonight Harry," Hermione said quietly. "You were amazing. Dumbledore would have been so proud." Ron nodded, looking towards his best friend who was just as dirty as the rest of them.

Harry looked bashful, head bent down towards his empty plate. Ron thought that this was why his best friend had survived, why he was a true hero; that even after saving the world and surviving to tell the tale, he was embarrassed. Ron's inner monologue was interrupted by said hero, "I couldn't have done it without either of you. I don't know what else I would have done if you hadn't been there these past seven years." Hermione and Ginny were in tears, grinning. Ron patted his friend on the back with his own lop-sided grin.

"Neither can we," he answered. There was a silence throughout the hall, and then cheers as everyone once again applauded the Boy Who Lived.

-

Ron's arm was curved around Hermione the entire time back up to the dormitory where they had stayed for six years of their lives. Hermione didn't necessarily want to leave Ron's side, nor Harry's, because she was so used to their snores and sleep patterns that she was sure she wouldn't be able to sleep. It was much like Shell Cottage when she awoke several times at night only hearing silence beyond the darkness of her bedroom. She doesn't say anything to Ron about it though, because she didn't want any more unnecessary concern (although she was quite sure he wouldn't mind).

They walked straight to the stairs, mumbling hellos to the other residents of the night as they went. Stopping right before the staircase, Ron turned Hermione to face him.

"Well, I suppose this is goodnight," he said, running his fingers up and down her arms. Hermione nodded, suddenly shy. This was Ron of all people, and she wasn't sure what she was so worried about.

"Yes, I suppose tomorrow is another busy day." Ron smiled a small, sad smile that didn't reach his eyes and Hermione wished for nothing more than that brightness to shine. Throwing her arms around his neck, she mumbled a kiss into his exposed skin above the collar of his torn shirt. His arms were behind her back, running strongly against where her shirt had ridden up. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't survived," she admitted quietly. When he didn't respond, Hermione wondered if she had spoken too lowly for him to hear.

"I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't survived," he repeated tenderly, squeezing her in surprise. She hugged him all the tighter, trying to be brave and step away from his warm body that was alive and well. She finally gathered the courage and pulled away, turning to climb the stairs.

His hand on her elbow stopped her and she turned to face him. Leaning in with one hand cupping her cheek, he moved slowly looking her straight in the eye before the briefest and sweetest brush of his lips on hers. She gasped at the touch, how much it ignited the blood pumping in her veins and accelerating her heart beat. He stayed still, his lips just a breath away from hers. She fluttered her eyes open, her eyelashes brushing his cheekbones, to see his eyes opened with that bright blue in his irises.

"Sweet dreams, love," he murmured. She nodded, unable to speak. Her knees were weak as she turned to face the stairs again. She wasn't sure how she made it upstairs, but she was fairly sure she floated the entire time.


	2. Part the Second

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: As always, read, review, and all that jazz. You have no idea how much your support means to me.

Five Firsts: Part the Second

_The first time Hermione and Ron saw each other after she returned to Hogwarts._

Hermione bustled her way through the moving crowd in the corridor, huffing past fellow students who all wore eager faces. She understood their excitement since it was the first Hogsmeade visit of the year but she felt that a little more order was also needed. Taking a deep breath, she continued past her peers to her bedroom she shared with the other seventh year girls that had either unfinished last term, or had not come back at all.

When she came to the portrait that held a fierce lion and her cubs, she murmured the password, "Survivors". It was an easy phrase that most common rooms held at one time or another after the war ended, and it was finally the turn of the returning students that were a year older than the actual seventh years. It was a smaller room that she entered, although it was still extravagant. All colors were prominent now without horrifically clashing, like Hermione once thought. She murmured her hellos to the other dorm students before making her way upstairs to the last room on the right, her very own bedroom.

Closing the door, Hermione finally let a huge grin escape on her face. True, she had been frustrated that the halls were full and slow moving, but she too was very excited about the Hogsmeade trip because this was the first time she would be seeing Ron since he had waved her off just over a month ago at the train station. A rather feminine sigh fell from her pink lips at the thought of her boyfriend. Dropping her heavy bag to the floor in a style only Ron would be proud of, Hermione floated towards her desk where a Muggle picture sat of her and her boyfriend that past summer.

-

"Why are we taking a Muggle picture Hermione? They don't even move!" Ron whined. Hermione fumed, blowing out hot puffs of air that made her bushy hair fall from her face briefly before again sticking to her sweaty skin. It was late July and the time to go back to school was approaching too fast for their liking. They were currently lounging at Harry and Ron's new apartment in Diagon Alley, unpacking and organizing. Harry and Ginny had taken a break and had escaped downtown to have a quiet lunch away from the ever bickering Hermione and Ron. Hermione knew she should have been offended, because honestly, they weren't that bad, but today Ron was being extraordinarily annoying. She loved him dearly, for sure, but he still got under her skin better than anyone else ever could.

"Ronald, I've told you a thousand times. I like the Muggle way of things sometimes. I don't understand why you can't just accept that," Hermione explained, leaning towards the box fan she had brought from her parents house. Just wearing a tank and shorts, she was still so hot and fighting with Ron was not helping matters at all. Tired of arguing over nothing, Hermione decided another tactic; one she knew would work. Closing her eyes briefly, she fluttered her eyelashes slowly and looked up at him slyly. Suddenly, his bright blue eyes turned dark and his beautiful lips parted, letting air escape. Feeling something other than the excitement of winning fell deep into her belly at his look and felt herself slipping closer to him. She let her long hair trail up his bare torso (he had taken his shirt off once Ginny and Harry had left saying, "I can't bloody take this heat anymore!") and placed her hand right in the middle of his chest.

"You win," he murmured, trying to lean forwards to catch her lips in what would have been a very promising kiss but Hermione wanted to tease him one moment later. Taking the camera from its place on the floor, she pulled it up and snapped a picture of him right when their lips met.

Much, much later after their not so innocent embrace ended, gratefully minutes before Harry and Ginny returned with two slices of apple pie, Hermione went to her camera to see how the picture turned out. She toyed with the idea to buy a digital camera once she had returned home to pick up her parents from Australia and was surprised when they had already purchased her one. Uploading the few pictures she had to her small laptop, another treasure she cherished, she looked through the photos, playing with the color schemes. When she got to their photo, she felt it was perfect for it to be in black and white.

"So, that's it then, huh?" Ron asked, coming into his bedroom behind her. Her wrapped his arm around her shoulders lightly, although it was late in the evening, the apartment was still sweltering. Hermione nodded, letting her head fall back to rest on him. Ron looked at it in silence for a moment. "I suppose it's not so bad," he said and Hermione grinned. She turned around in his arms and stood, placing another brazen kiss on his lips.

Ron knew that all that arguing would pay off after all as Hermione tore her shirt off to the floor and they picked up right where they left off that afternoon.

-

Hermione gazed longingly at the photo wishing that Ron was there with her. Instead, she knew she had a bittersweet hour long wait before students were released for the weekend. Because of her age, she was fortunate to be able to stay away from the castle the entire weekend and had made plans to stay with Harry and Ron at their apartment. Ginny was quite jealous because she wasn't of age yet to do so, but was making good use of the time she had with her boyfriend. Harry too was upset about their limited time, as Ron had mentioned in his letter, and they vowed to not make a big fuss in front of their two friends because they got an extra full day with each other.

'Try to keep your hands to yourself while we're in front of Harry, okay Hermione? Poor bloke won't stop mopping about just thinking about it," Ron had written. Hermione had chuckled, knowing that it wouldn't just be her that would struggle to keep her hands to herself.

Turning to her closet, Hermione reached in for her outfit that Ginny had planned on her to wear earlier that week. They both had gushed over what they would do once they would see their boyfriends, giggling and blushing, all the while making sure to keep some details to themselves for obvious reasons. Ginny had selected Ron's favorite color on Hermione (a little secret she had let her friend know about) – blue, "It brings out her eyes in the best way, don't you think?" he sighed dreamily as Hermione had come outside in a blue sundress. Ginny had pretended to gag at the thought of her brother being close to Hermione in that way, but told Hermione later on. Ginny picked out a thin blue sweater that had a deep V shape, with a beautiful white chemise underneath that had a touch of lace. It wasn't something that screamed Hermione, but Ginny had insisted that it would be perfect. Wearing her usual jeans, Hermione felt confident that this would fluster Ron more than anything.

"Besides Hermione, I don't think you'll want to keep this on for too long anyway, once you finally see my brother," Ginny chuckled, making Hermione blush deeply to the roots of her hair. She was even more embarrassed because she too had had the same thoughts earlier.

Hermione quickly changed out her robes and uniform to put the selected outfit on. She had already packed the night before when she couldn't sleep so she had a large amount of time to fill. Deciding to do something about her hair, she picked up and her hand and started working on the movements that Ginny had taught her that summer. Fifteen minutes later, Hermione finally found a hairdo that was comfortable for her. It was down, and the curls were more controlled, pinned back with small blue clips on each side. It would stay out of her eyes and as long as the weather stayed sunny, it had no chance of changing to frizzy and out of control.

She heard a small sound at her lone window and smiled when she saw that it was Pig. "Hello Pig," she murmured, letting the small bird enter the room. She stroked his feathers while he made a small, purring sound. "How's he holding up?" Logically she knew that Pig couldn't answer her outright, but with the way he fluttered his wings in excitement, she felt that maybe the owl understood. "I'm pretty excited myself," she smiled. Taking the letter from his outstretched leg, she reached down to her lowest desk drawer to find a small treat. Pig nipped at her extended finger and then flew off.

Hermione opened the letter in a rush.

"_Hermione,_

_I can hardly wait to hold you in my arms this weekend. I've missed you so much._

_Love,_

_Ron_

_P.S. Piss on Harry. I won't be able to keep my hands from you at all."_

Grinning like a madwoman, Hermione folded the note carefully after reading it thru twice more and moving it to her collection of other letters sent from the adorable red-head. She cheered to herself thinking she only had forty more minutes.

-

Ron grinned to himself, watching Pig fly away with his short letter to Hermione. He knew she'd respond warmly to the last part of the note. He reached out to close his bedroom window and turned back to his room. It was still unorganized, but he had tried to tidy it in his minimal time. He had been busy at the joke shop and with George's continuing to test his newest products on him and Harry; he hadn't had much time to clean up his place. Harry had made sure his room was spotless though, and had begun to clean up the shared living space. Ron groaned, lifting a stray sock from his bedpost. "Bloody hell," he murmured. He threw the sock into the corner's clothes basket, looking around for any other piece of stray clothing.

"Ron, have you seen Pig? I wanted to send a note to your Dad about work," Harry asked, coming right into his room. Ron grinned.

"Just went on a delivery for me, mate. He should return soon though," he replied.

"A note for you?" Harry smirked. "It wouldn't happen to be for Hermione would it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Harry," Ron quipped, striding out of the room to clean up his lunch plate. Harry followed behind him, chuckling. "Should I even ask what you're asking my Dad about?"

At this, Harry paled. He reached to scratch his messy hair behind his ear. "Harry?"

"Well, I've been thinking a lot lately, about your sister and me. And I wanted to make this weekend special…" he began. Ron came to his own conclusion.

"You want to marry her," he said simply. Harry watched him in trepidation, wondering when the blow would come from his best friend. "I figured it'd happen sooner or later. I'd rather it be later, but I figure with what my mother will want to plan for it, it won't happen that soon. You have my blessing."

"Thanks Ron," Harry beamed. Ron noted the look in his friend's eye, the gleam he himself got whenever he thought of Hermione. Then he felt something deep in his stomach. "Mate? Are you okay?"

"You don't think Hermione will expect me to propose to her too, then? I mean, it's the first time I'll have seen her in over a month and she has seemed pretty excited about it too. I'm not ready for that yet!" Ron exclaimed, running his hands through his hair. Harry frowned.

"You don't have to do anything you're not ready to do, Ron! This wasn't a ploy for you to propose to her too, you know!"

"Bloody hell," he murmured again, taking a seat at their table. Harry laughed shortly, watching his worried friend.

"Shouldn't I be the one nervous?" Ron looked up and rolled his eyes.

"Not funny Harry." Ron sighed. "Good luck mate. I think it's great."

"Thanks, really."

-

Ron paced impatiently, waiting for the familiar brunette to make her appearance outside of Honeydukes, their planned meeting spot. He could see Harry from the corner of his eye, looking out in the crowd for his sister, but he was hiding his impatience better than he was.

Moments later, a blur of red ran past him, tangling herself around Harry, laughing and kissing him soundly. Ron sighed, hoping that his girl wasn't far behind. He was about to turn back and face the crowd again when a finger tapped him on the shoulder. He froze and murmured, "Hermione?"

"Oh honestly," she laughed, turning him around and throwing herself into his arms, and he smiled.


	3. Part The Third

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks for the amazing reviews so far. Part the Fourth is also finished, but I might add some more or subtract from it. Also, Part the Fifth is midway through the writing process, so the wait should be rather short. This is a cliff-hanger of sorts, so look out for Part The Fourth soon!

So, as always, your support means everything. Read and review!

Five Firsts: Part the Third

_The first real fight with one leaving._

It was over something stupid, she knew. But nonetheless, she was still upset that he would chose to say those things to her, the type of words that would cut her worse than Bellatrix Lestrange's knife ever could.

-

Ron was beyond excited that the Christmas holidays were there because that meant for an entire week that Hermione would be at his flat. Hermione with limited clothing. Hermione's full attention on him. Hermione's mouth on his.

"Oi, stop being so cheery," Harry said, playfully punching his roommate on his shoulder. Ron couldn't hide the smile on his face.

"It's nearly Christmas Harry! I have an excuse!" Ron said, going about their flat with his wand waving, putting up ribbons and bows around every available space. Harry watched from his seat perched at their kitchen counter with a steamy mug of tea.

"I suppose I just don't get the holiday. It's my first outside of Hogwarts so it's a bit odd," Harry explained and Ron nodded to him absentmindedly.

"Do you think the tree would look okay here, by the corner? Or, no! Over here by the window, so people can see the lights down below!" Ron asked, jumping from space to space.

"I guess I never realized how important the holiday is to you, Ron. I always knew it was your favorite, but isn't this a bit overboard?"

"Harry, one can never go overboard with Christmas decorations," Ron said seriously and Harry hid a chuckle behind his mug. "Besides," he added nonchalantly, "Hermione's coming in tomorrow for a week, and since we won't be able to spend the actual Christmas Day together, I thought that I could make what we had our own little Christmas."

Harry watched as Ron began to set up their recently bought tree, his ears a bright red. He nodded to himself and sighed, placing his mug down onto the counter. "I agree, the tree by the window is the best idea. It gives a nice image for Hermione to come home to, don't you think?"

"I think that's brilliant, thanks Harry."

-

It had been over a month since Hermione had seen Ron. Hermione walked down the street pulling her trunk through the snow. The flakes were falling down around her and she hadn't realized that she was humming a Christmas carol she loved as a girl. It was nearly seven in the evening, as she was running late with her duties at school, but had warned Ron of her tardiness. He was upset, but she knew it was also in his excitement to see her. "Don't worry Ron, I'm all yours once I get there," she assured him and his answering growl as almost enough to get her to hurry to his side that instant.

Now that she could see his flat only a few yards in front of her, she began mentally going over everything she had brought with her. She was exhausted, true, and knew she had work to be done, and found that doing it sooner rather than later would be her best option. She hid a yawn behind her gloved hand and trudged forward and finally knocked on the door. She hadn't even heaved her hand up again before Ron opened the door and pulled her into his arms. "Finally," she thought he murmured against her cold neck. She wasn't sure he said it or if she had simply imagined it, but she felt the same. _Finally, indeed._

-

They stood over his coffee table glaring at each other. They were both breathing heavily and Ron's eyes were dangerously dark, but Hermione was too stubborn to back down now. "Fine," he said finally. He turned from their eye war and made his way to the front door.

"Ron, where do you think you're going?" Hermione cried out angrily, ready to hash out again. He didn't answer with words; instead the slamming of the door was his response.

She huffed aloud, looking around at the damage their fight had cost. She had been writing a paper for Slughorn, something about the importance of a potion that could heal all cuts and make certain scars disappear forever, and Ron had been interrupting her nonstop, trying to get her undivided attention. She would have loved to give him that, truly, but she only had a week with him during Christmas holidays and then the rest of the time would be spent at home with her parents. She knew that the scroll wouldn't take her long to finish, and she would have much rather been locked in Ron's room for hours, but priorities called for school first. She just wished Ron would have seen it that way too.

Usually, when they both still attended school, neither would walk out of the room like this. But, that was also before they were a couple and time was precious. Hermione felt the strain falling down on her shoulders, how she had missed Ron so much and how boring school was without the three of them, together. It was getting to be too much and several times she had thought about leaving school and just starting work, just to be with Ron forever. But, logistically, she knew she only had months to go and her forever with Ron could finally start without interruptions.

She knew that Ginny felt the same way, but had Mrs. Weasley to deal with; so her decision was made for her.

Hermione could hold herself together like no one else could, and from the way Ron had hovered since she had arrived the day before, she knew he was trying hard to compose himself. His letters held impatience, wishing for her to sneak out and stay with him over the weekend, or he himself going to Hogwarts for a moonlight walk. Although tempting, it wasn't right and she hated to break the rules now that she didn't have to.

She missed him dearly, craved for his touch every moment, but couldn't he see that she was doing this for them, that everything she ever did was to make herself better for him?

-

Ron was completely hacked off at Hermione. He understood that schoolwork came first, like always, but he'd hoped for at least some attention during Hermione's stay during her Christmas break. He'd taken off a full day of work from George's shop to spend it with her, and grew frustrated when he came out from his shower to see his girlfriend working diligently on a scroll.

First, he thought that he could distract her. He planted himself on the couch behind her, running his hands through her silky hair. She tensed, recognizing his ploy, and decided to ignore him. He tried harder, this time leaning forward and kissing her neck, brushing her long hair to the other side of her shoulders. She tilted her head slightly, an instant reaction whenever Ron hit her spot behind her ear, but then she recoiled.

"Honestly, Ronald. I need to work on this for Professor Slughorn," she'd spat out and he was instantly pissed.

"Oi! This is your vacation! You should be relaxing!"

"I fully intend to, Ron, but I need to do this first. Go bother someone else for another hour!" She was angry too, he realized, and he knew he shouldn't have pushed her buttons, that she was right (she was always right) and school did come first. But Bloody Hell, he was horny, he was in love, and he missed her desperately. She was there, but she wasn't fully there.

His words and her angry retorts followed and finally, he stormed out of his own apartment.

So that was why he was walking the streets without a jacket in the snow. He could hear carols being sung within the pub a few blocks down and snuck a look in the window to see groups huddled together at tables that were bursting with drinks and snacks. His stomach grumbled, but he had also forgotten his wallet and he wasn't about to go home; not yet.

Instead, Ron walked it off, pacing up and down the streets of Hogsmeade, cursing Hermione, then cursing himself for having left his girlfriend in his apartment. He was in a load of trouble when he returned.

-

After Ron left his flat, Hermione went back to work on her essay, hoping that her work would keep her occupied. However, as the hands moved on the clock above the fireplace, her frustration grew that Ron hadn't come back to grovel, nor that she could write. Groaning, she threw her papers to the floor into a mess she didn't want to deal with.

"Stupid boy!" she exclaimed, and then corrected herself. "Man! Men! Ugh!" She threw her hands up into the air and stretched her entire body, standing from her spot on the floor. She began to pace the floor, hands held behind her back, watching the door every few moments to see it open with an embarrassed Ron. But the door never opened.

As she continued to pace the floor she felt her resolve crumbling as tears began to fall from her tired eyes. She was tired from traveling and having to schedule herself around Ron's timeframe and her family's. She wanted to spend her time with him, snogging, relaxing, but she knew that work had to come first.

Then the fear came as the minutes ticked by, that maybe he'd had enough. That he had finally decided that she wasn't worth the wait anymore. That he deserved to be first in someone's life. That he wasn't coming back.

Hermione felt herself drop to the floor crying, remembering and feeling the pain she had during the hunt when he left the first time.

Outside in the night, carolers walked down the cold and snowy street into the darkness of the holidays.


	4. Part the Fourth

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of. (This is the reason for the 'M' rating!)  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you for all of the amazing reviews I've recieved for the first three parts to my five part series! I've been writing the fifth installment diligently while taking breaks from my complete series watching of _Dawson's Creek_, so I hope that it should be finished soon. However, the last section is running rather long so I will be having two parts to the Part the Fifth. These should be out soon! As always, review!

Five Firsts: Part the Fourth

_The first make-up._

Ron was the one to give in first. Although it was several hours later that he returned to his apartment, late in the night, he came in loudly, hoping for Hermione to hear him, to wake from her slumber. He was so sure she was sleeping in fact, that he sighed after hearing nothing. He toed off his shoes and went to the fire to warm himself up. "I'm an idiot," he said to himself, shaking from the cold.

"Yes you are," she said quietly, coming from the direction of the kitchen.

"Hermione," Ron said. She was still too far away and he just wanted the fight to end already. "Love, I'm sorry about earlier. I'm freezing and I just want to get warmed up and head to bed."

"Well I'm not done yet," Hermione replied, and Ron groaned.

"I was a prat, okay? I just wanted to spend time with you! Is that so wrong?" he cried out, pulling at his wet hair.

"I was trying to finish my work, Ron. School's very important to me! You of all people should understand that!"

"And I do! But you spend months away at that school and I'm lucky to get a weekend with you here or there. I miss you! I like coming home from work and seeing you here on my couch, waiting for me."

"Like a good little housewife you mean?" she exclaimed. Ron groaned again.

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," he retorted quietly. Hermione didn't say anything still, and was stubbornly leaning against the doorway where Ron couldn't see her face properly. He sat down wearily, trying to warm himself up, just exhausted from walking and fighting. He wanted his bed with her in it, and it looked like he wasn't going to get either.

Her sniffles captured his attention as soon as he heard them. "Hermione?" She was crying now, but she wasn't trying to hide her face from him. "Love, I'm sorry. You know that I…"

"You didn't come back. I sat here and waited and you didn't come back."

-

He knows that she still has nightmares of him leaving during the hunt. That she wakes up in the middle of the night in sweat covered pajamas and screams till her throat is sore. He hates himself more each time for leaving in the first place, for causing her pain. She's embarrassed by them, hating that it happens, swearing that she knows he would never leave her again, especially not now. He vows, while holding her, rocking her to sleep with kisses and soft words, that he'll always come back to her; there's nowhere else he would ever want to be than in her arms.

-

Ron felt like he was going to cry then too, with the way Hermione clung to herself. She had worked herself up too much. He noticed the hunch in her shoulders from leaning over large books in the library and ink stains on her fingers and how tense her whole body was. She was exhausted too. He'd just been too bloody stupid to notice it.

"Oh, love…" he begun and then she was in his arms and the fight is over, for then at least. She sobbed hard into his chest. She seemed to be comforted momentarily before she began to beat her small fists into his shirt. He tried to grab for her wrists to stop her, but she was determined.

"You promised… you promised me!" she cried. Finally, he had managed to get a hold of hands, pulling her into his embrace although she fought against him. "No!" He didn't care that she was fighting him, he wanted her to be angry at him. She was right.

"I know I promised, Hermione. That's why I'm here. I always come back to you," he murmured, trying to get her to listen.

"You broke your promise before, too! What was so different about this time?" she asked, her attack subsiding.

"Because now I can admit that I was wrong, because I've grown up. I love you Hermione, so much that sometimes I don't know how to control myself. As you can see, the strain of this long distance relationship has gotten to my brain."

"You don't think it's hard for me too? I miss you every moment I'm awake, every second I'm asleep." Ron nodded.

"I know, but I guess that I just didn't understand it that well. I always knew you were too good for me and I was afraid that maybe you realized it." Ron looked down, in shame. Hermione had stopped struggling against him and pulled herself flush on his body.

"I've told you millions of times how much I love you Ron Weasley. Why wouldn't you believe me?" Hermione shook her head, tears still falling down her red face. She dropped his hands and captured his cheeks with her small grasp until his gaze was met with hers. "I love you. I love you so much that I can't seem to calm down while you're in my sights. I try so hard to be good, that work is my only true distraction from jumping you the moment you're in the room."

Ron blushed at that, with a small smirk on his face. Hermione laughed. "Really?"

"Yes, really. That's why I wanted to get my work done as soon as I could. Because I knew if I let you touch me, I would melt and never get anything done. You hold this power over me Ron Weasley and it scares me so much that you have that kind of control. That so easily I could shatter to a million pieces," she said, holding his face firmly between her fingers. He reciprocated the same, placing his warm hands around her cheeks.

"You hold that same power over me."

-

Minutes went by as they held each other and then the familiar buzz happened as soon as their bodies hit just the right spot with each others. Hermione bit back a moan and Ron's eyes darkened and although she was still raw from the fight, Ron seemed extremely eager to prove how sorry he was for ever letting her second guess him.

Reaching up, Ron pulled Hermione's hair lose from her ponytail, watching the tendrils fall over her shoulders gracefully. The few locks that fell to her face he removed with a gentle care to tuck behind her ears. Hermione sighed, closing her eyes as his fingers grazed the soft plains of her cheek. She was already melting into his embrace and felt her knees weaken without him even touching her lips.

She didn't remember a time that she was ever unsatisfied making love with Ron. He always made it special, no matter how long it lasted (the first time was mere minutes) or how awkward (the third time). This time, though, seemed to be something else too and she knew that it would be amazing. The night before when she arrived to his flat, they had rushed themselves into his bedroom, muttering a hello in Harry's direction, and spent the better part of the evening undressing quickly, because they just needed the connection all the sooner.

This time, Ron wanted to take his time cherishing his girlfriend.

Letting his hands skim her sides, he pushed underneath her shirt, running his fingers across her belly, circling her bellybutton. She sucked in a deep breath at his gentle caresses, already wanting more. Finally, he pulled her shirt up, but stopping every few inches to stroke the newly exposed skin to his touch. After what seemed like hours Ron succeeded in pulling the shirt away from her, letting it fall to the floor in a clump. Standing before him in worn jeans and a pink cotton bra, she felt beautiful from the way Ron was looking at her. Her insides twitched and she felt moisture pool between her legs. She was powerless to his blue eyes and without thinking, reached behind and unclasped her bra and without breaking eye contact, had pulled the flimsy material from her arms so that it too met the floor.

Ron's gaze didn't waver from hers but he stepped closer to her bringing his heaving chest heavenly close to hers. She didn't like being unequal and reached forward to pull his sweater off. He was still cold, or maybe it was her touch, but his freckled skin held goosebumps as well. Hermione knew she'd find a way to warm them up. "Let's sit on the couch, shall we?" she murmured, clasping onto his hand and leading him further into the living room.

It was Hermione's dirtiest thought to shag Ron on the rug before the hearth in the Burrow, but as she knew at the moment it wouldn't happen, she figured a romp on their own rug would suffice for the time being. Ron sat down on the couch and Hermione parted his legs with her thighs before falling to her knees before him. He groaned at the image of her before him, already wondering what was going on her mind. "Oh God," he murmured as she flicked at the button of his jeans and lowering his fly slowly. He pushed his hips up to assist getting his pants off and she pulled them down his legs, keeping her eyes on him the entire time. Ron could feel her finger tips running up his legs, almost marking each freckle as her own as her hands made their way up to his all too hard erection. When she finally grasped onto the length he almost died.

But then, Hermione said, "You never cease to amaze me," and pulled him into her wet mouth and his eyes rolled up into the back of his head.

She suckled him, taking care to use a hand to hold the base where her mouth couldn't reach. Ron knew that this meant a lot, her giving him this attention, for she didn't enjoy it much. So when she did, he knew he'd owe her much more than a simple, "thank you."

"Oh Hermione, so good," Ron groaned and Hermione moaned too, it vibrating through her mouth onto his cock. "Don't stop… don't ever stop…"

Pulling away, Ron watched her lick her mouth, bringing him just to the brink. His eyes, still dark, were in lusty slits and Hermione knew she was in trouble. Before she could take a breath, Ron had already thrown her back onto the floor, his naked body covering hers. "Now, this isn't very fair is it? You aren't naked," Ron noted, reaching between them to lower the zipper on her jeans. Hermione sighed, arching her back to rid herself of the last barriers between them. Now that she was done teasing and ready for the finale, Ron wanted to slow down.

"Ron, please… just… _do it_!" Ron chuckled darkly, watching Hermione writhe beneath him. It wasn't often that Hermione was this vocal and it thrilled him more than the mouth work she had just done. But, he needed to know she was really ready for him first. Keeping her knickers on (blue, with pink lace to match her discarded bra), he edged his fingers to palm her front, feeling for the coarse hair but to his surprise, it was bare. It was Hermione's turn to chuckle. "Just had it done this morning while you were still sleeping."

"You cheeky thing!" He couldn't put many more words together than that, so he splayed his fingers over the skin there and reached down to kiss her awaiting mouth because the smirk needed to be wiped from her face. For once, he wanted to be in complete control. He plunged his tongue passed her lips, working in time with his fingers down below. She was breathing deeply now, struggling to keep up.

"More," she urged when he pulled away from her mouth to cover her neck with kisses and suckles. Her hands cupped his back side, trying to get his lower half closer. _Not yet_, he thought.

He pumped her slowly, finally pulling his wet fingers out. Ron went about to make a show of licking his fingers and closing his eyes, groaning at the wonderful taste of his girlfriend. When he opened his eyes a second later, Hermione's eyes were black with need and he was sure she couldn't wait any longer then he could.

Without any more preamble, he plunged his cock into her center, feeling her tight, wet walls clenching around him. His body quivered in pleasure, his arms straining from supporting himself. He was pounding into her lower half and she was falling into her own pit of heaven, or hell because she just wanted the release.

Wanting to toy with her a bit more, Ron pulled out and teased her entrance and she groaned out of annoyance. "What do you want?" he spoke out. Hermione tensed, but he prayed that she would say something.

"Ron… please," she mumbled, trying to use her hands to bring him closer but he stayed firmly in his position, the tip of his length poised to her heat.

"What do you want?" he repeated, beginning to slip inside, but pulled back again. He was also feeling tortured, but he wanted this kind of pain. In the end it would all be worth it.

"Inside…" she started, grabbing blindly at anything she could reach. Ron eyed her, just wishing she would say it already. Finally, Hermione exploded. "Ron, fuck me!"

Ron's eyes enlarged in hopeless wonder and then plunged into her so deep that she came instantly from the contact. She contracted around him so tightly that he soon followed with a hoarse cry of his own. Sweat poured down his back as he allowed himself to pull out of her warmth and fall to his side. Heart pounding, he closed his eyes trying to control his breathing. He could feel Hermione shift to face him and he felt her warmth breath as she wrapped herself around him.

"Will you finish your work in the morning, then?" Ron asked after he could form a full sentence. He could feel Hermione's laughter as her body shook.

"Honestly."


	5. Part the Fifth A

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I had no idea where this would go when I wrote it. It's much more angst filled than I planned, honest. This was the hardest section to write however, and I hope that it was worth the pain.

So sorry, but this is a cliffhanger! I'm so into this story that I can't seem to stop writing it! So watch out for the upcoming Part the Fifth B! As always, please review!

Five Firsts: Part the Fifth A

_The first break-up._

Harry and Ginny had been engaged for a little less than six months before they finally set a date. Hermione counts it at exactly 150 days since Harry proposed, so it was at least 151 days that Ron knew about Harry having a ring. Hermione also knew that Ron was never going to propose.

Hermione loved her boyfriend dearly, couldn't wait to spend the rest of her days with him in a small house with a large yard, with a wooden swing that they could sit on and watch the fireflies and sun go down. However, her boyfriend was a complete dolt sometimes. Nevermind the sweet things he would do for her, which would be almost anything, but really, was it so hard to get down on one knee and do things the proper way?

Never considering herself an actress, Hermione had perfected the fake. "Hermione, what do you think of the color rouge for the bridesmaids? I think the red would reflect Harry's eyes beautifully," Mrs. Weasley gushed, but Ginny actually sided with her mother. For Ginny had that glazed look in her eye that Hermione wanted since Ron captured her in his arms during the war. "What do you think about that Ginny? The color would remind Harry of you, I think. It's very romantic."

Ginny nodded, simply glowing. "Mum, it's perfect. Hermione, don't you think so?"

Hermione was thinking of how a pale blue would offset Ginny's skin, along with the other bridesmaids; herself in a cream, lacey gown and she'd walk down the aisle with her father dressed elegantly in a tuxedo, her mother crying in the background, and at the archway her future husband was waiting; Ron.

"Hermione?" Ginny looked at her urgently.

"It's perfect Ginny." Satisfied, the mother and daughter turned through the magazine, stopping to comment on flower arrangements. Hermione, on the other hand, heard a lonely chime and felt its company.

-

"I don't know what's wrong with her, Harry. She hasn't been herself for the past weeks," Ron explained to Harry over lunch at their old apartment. They were in the middle of packing Harry's belongings to be moved into his new home with Ginny. The wedding was mere days away and everyone was on their last nerves with Mrs. Weasley's planning.

"Who?" asked Harry, a bit of soup falling down his stubbled chin. Ron handed him a napkin but followed on.

"Hermione. She's been off with me. We go out to a picture, get a bite, and then kip back here for a bit."

"That doesn't sound off to me, Ron," Harry replied but Ron was already shaking his head.

"No, it's like… she's there, but she's not. She did this earlier when school was still in session, when she was anxious about an exam, but never this long. I've tried talking to her about it, but she just looks worse afterwards."

"And you don't have any idea what's wrong?"

"No. But I thought maybe she would have mentioned something to you on your lunches together," Ron said, pointing his spoon at his best friend. Harry shook his head and took another spoonful of soup into his mouth.

"She hasn't said anything to me about it. But, I suppose I know what you mean. She has been out of sorts, since I've been asking a lot of the questions lately," Harry said, shrugging.

"Maybe I should ask Ginny? They've been planning a lot lately, with Mum, so they might know something," Ron said, putting his head in his hands. "I just wish I knew what was wrong so I could fix it. This whole thing is worse than fighting because I can't apologize. Maybe I should say sorry anyways, just in case that's what's wrong with her."

"Ron, you can't apologize every time Hermione has an issue, especially if it's not your doing. I'm sure she'll come around. You've both been really great together, so I'm guessing she's just researching a way to tell you," Harry thought out loud. Ron nodded nonchalantly, reaching towards his tea. "If you want, I could try and talk to her for you?"

But once Harry saw the gleam in Ron's eye, he knew he should have never bothered to try.

-

"Hermione, you look nice," Harry complimented his other best friend as she reached their regular table at the pub in Muggle London they frequented every Wednesday evening. Hermione blushed, looking down at the sweater her mother had purchased for her graduation present.

"Thank you Harry." She gave him an eye as he pulled her seat out, helping her push in to the table before he made his way to his own chair.

"How are you doing? I haven't seen you since Sunday's dinner at the Burrow," Harry asked, watching his friend as she read through the menu they both knew she had memorized.

"Just fine. Work's been keeping me fairly busy with any extra time your future mother-in-law gives me. I swear, I wouldn't have accepted Ginny's maid of honor position if I knew it would be more work than actual work." Harry chuckled at Hermione's smirk. He knew that she loved his future wife, but he could sense a tenseness to her shoulders at the topic.

"You look quite tired from it." Hermione shrugged, but didn't comment further. "I can have a word with Molly if you'd like. I realize she's been taking over some of the duties too much…"

"But it's her only daughter Harry. I'm truly happy to be a part of this day for Ginny, and you for that matter," Hermione explained, grabbing a hold of his hand across the table. He squeezed her hand in response.

"I love that you feel that way Hermione. You know I'd do the same for you," he said, smiling. Hermione however frowned slightly and pulled her hand from his slowly. Immediately, Harry sensed what Ron was talking about. "Are you really okay? Is it a fight with Ron?" Hermione looked up in shock.

"Heaven's no! Did Ron say something to make you think that?" she exclaimed.

Harry shook his head. "No, but he did mention something about you being different lately. He's worried about you."

"He shouldn't be worried. Nothing's wrong."

"You would tell me, though, if there was, right?" he asked, concerned.

"Of course," she asked as the waiter came to take their order. Harry watched as Hermione ordered her usual course of a Caesar's salad in respect; for he knew she was lying through her teeth and had been. He knew that Ron was right and felt it his duty, for payback for all of the years that they helped him, to help them.

"My usual, please," Harry said, handing both menus to the waiter. He nodded and smiled before leaving their table. Hermione was already playing with her napkin, fraying the edges. "Out with it, please."

Hermione looked up at him, already having tears in her eyes. She took a large gulp of air and finally spoke. "I suppose this is our last lunch together." Harry's eyebrows crunched together.

"What do you mean?"

Hermione explained, "Well after this weekend, you'll be a husband. Then you'll be away on honeymoon for over two weeks, and with work and having a new family and house and life, you won't have time for this."

"Hermione, I'm always going to want to have lunch with you," he started but she stopped him with a shake of her head.

"Harry, it's going to be different and you know that." Harry couldn't disagree with her statement so he just looked at her. "I understand that things have changed, and it's wonderful, and I'm so happy that you got your happy ending. I think in my own way, I'm giving my brother away." Harry grinned at her and Hermione brightened a bit at that. She wiped a stray tear away from her cheek, looking bashful.

"I suppose it is like that in a way," he agreed. "But you'll always be my sister no matter who I'm with or what I'm doing or where I'm at. Maybe we won't be able to do this every week, but we'll find the time. Besides, I think Ginny will be kicking me out once she sees my living habits and will be begging you to take me out of the house."

Hermione laughed and sniffed and Harry handed her his handkerchief. "I love you Harry. You're my best friend," she said and he nodded affectionately, reaching once again for her hand.

"I love you too, Hermione. I don't know what I would have done without you all these years."

"Kill Ron, that's for sure," she quipped, dabbing at her eyes.

"Yeah, but he loves me too, the big git," he laughed and Hermione looked down. "He loves you too, you know. It's sick really, the way he goes on about you sometimes." Hermione blushed, looking down at their hands, but she had the same sad look in her eyes again. Harry began to realize why. "If I can get my happy ending, so can you."

-

Mrs. Weasley had both Ron and Harry running errands right up till the eve of the wedding to gather materials for the big feast she was preparing for the rehearsal dinner. Ron was completely ready for the wedding to be over, and was wiping his brow when an equally tired looking Hermione entered the kitchen carrying a large box full of dusty dishes.

"Oi, let me take that," he said, reaching for the box from her arms. She looked grateful, and murmured a quiet thank you. "What is all this?"

"It's just some dishes your mum found out in the shed that we'll need for tonight. She asked me to wash them for her," Hermione explained with a sigh.

Ron set the box down on the counter and turned towards his girlfriend. "I'm really sorry about all of this." He walked toward her from behind, reaching his arms around her and placing a kiss on her bare shoulder.

"What do you mean?" she asked, relaxing into his embrace. Ron couldn't remember the last time she'd allowed this closeness. He realized he'd missed this too much and wanted to correct it.

"Mum, the wedding, everything. I knew she'd go crazy about it and I'm sorry you got roped into it. Mum should see how tired you are, to give you a break."

"It'll be over tomorrow, Ron. And honestly, it hasn't been that awful. It'll be worth it to see Ginny's face tomorrow," Hermione admitted, turning from Ron's arms and busied herself with the box she had brought in.

"But I feel like I've barely seen you since they decided to set a date. You've just graduated and you're working now, and with the wedding, I'm lucky to see you maybe once or twice a week, but it's only about the wedding," Ron frowned.

"Ron, not everything can be about you. Aren't you at all happy for your sister and best friend?" Hermione huffed, pulling out the dishes and putting them in the sink to wash.

"Of course I'm happy! But am I not allowed to pine after my girlfriend?" Ron grinned, trying to pull Hermione back to him. She held fast and frowned.

"I really need to do this washing. We'll have plenty of time to ourselves later on." Ron groaned and Hermione watched him with a pointed eyebrow.

"Take five minutes away from it, please! It's a bloody wedding!" he exclaimed.

"A bloody wedding? Is that what this is to you?" Hermione yelled. She shook her head, closing her eyes. When she opened them, Ron could see something bursting in her eyes. "This is the most important day in your sister's life, Ronald. Her first and only wedding day. And it should be perfect and amazing and as the maid of honor, it's my duty to make it the best to my ability. Now maybe this ceremony isn't that important to you, but it is to me."

"Why is it so important to you? It's not your wedding!" Ron said and he could almost see the dam finally break.

"How could I forget?" she spat, striding from the room. Ron watched her leave in shock, a stray dish smashed on the floor; his heart.

-

Hermione dressed in Ginny's room for the rehearsal dinner. She had planned on wearing something that would shock Ron to get her mind off of the whole wedding, and try and think of the positives in her own life. However, with the recent bickering between the two, all of her thoughts were furious rather than confused. So, she pulled out the low cut black shirt and white skirt in disdain, but slipping the outfit on nonetheless. Ginny stepped into the room right as she finished zipping up her skirt.

"That's lovely, Hermione," she smiled, pinning her hair back with a clip. Hermione nodded without thinking. "Is something wrong?"

"No, everything's fine Ginny," she lied, paying attention now. "Oh, let me help you with that." She reached forward to clip Ginny's necklace in place on her neck.

"Harry said he had a nice talk the other day at lunch."

"Yes, Harry and I always have nice chats," Hermione replied. Ginny watched her friend in the mirror with concern. She finally turned in her vanity chair and grabbed her hand.

"I just wanted you to know that I love that even though I've been all about this wedding that you can still talk to me about anything. I'm sorry I've been so distracted throughout all of it, I hadn't realized I'd gotten so wrapped up in it," she apologized with a sad look on her too beautiful face. Hermione smiled a small smile.

"Ginny, I'm glad that you're so invested in this. This wedding is going to be beautiful because of what you've done. I'm glad I could have helped." Ginny squeezed her hand in reply. "But as for me, I will be rather glad when tomorrow comes."

"Have I been that horrible?"

"It's not you, Ginny, I swear it. It's your git of a brother," Hermione grimaced and Ginny's mouth fell into a straight line.

"What's he done this time?"

Hermione looked at her female best friend and couldn't hide her hurt; what she had been trying to do, to hide this from her happy bride to be friend. Ginny frowned as she saw Hermione's eyes fill with tears. "He hasn't done anything, I'm afraid." Ginny stood quickly, wrapping Hermione in her small arms. The elder shuddered, letting her emotions consume her being. Ginny shushed her patiently, patting her hair and rubbing her back consolingly.

"He's a right git, isn't he?" she murmured, shaking her head as Hermione pulled away.

With a sniffle, she replied, "It's not all him I suppose." Hermione looked down at her arms that were folded on her chest. Ginny reached over for an old hanky she had and handed it to her crying companion. "Thanks."

"Have you talked to him about it?"

Hermione chuckled. "No, nor do I intend to. This isn't the right time, I know that. But, I'd just hoped that well, maybe if he was at least thinking about it. Because I have, thought about it, that is."

"Of course you have! You love him; it's only natural to think about marrying him. Why you chose him is beyond me, though." Hermione laughed, allowing Ginny to smile. "He's a bit slow about things, but if I know my brother, he'll come around."

-

Ron helped his mother and father bring out all the plates for the feast to feed easily a hundred, with only more than twenty people actually in attendance. Hermione had appeared to busy herself with other matters of the evening, almost never leaving Ginny's side. He knew as best man that he should have been with Harry, but his best friend was seemingly boggled down with a massive pile of Weasley members that even he didn't want to be around. Ron figured that staying and helping his parents would be his safest bet.

However, this did not stray his eyes from watching his Hermione all evening. She was simply gorgeous in her attire of black and white, with her hair pulled elegantly in a low ponytail, a pearl necklace accenting her long and achingly beautiful neck and collarbones. All Ron wanted to do was place kisses along the exposed skin that her blouse allowed, but knew that from their earlier fight, he had other responsibilities.

"This will do fine Ron, right here," his mother instructed, so he set down the large pot of stew down where she pointed.

"You've outdone yourself yet again Molly, dear," his father said, his mother blushing.

"Oh it's nothing," she said, lifting up her apron to dab at her already moist eyes. "I have one more thing to grab in the kitchen." His mother bustled right back into the house without a backwards glance. He took a gander around the group outside, the beginning of summer weather settling in nicely. He didn't notice that his father stood beside him until he spoke.

"She's beautiful tonight," he commented. Ron immediately glanced towards his sister who was grabbing onto Harry's arm to lean in and tell him something. She was beaming, anyone could tell.

"Yes, Ginny does look nice."

"Well, yes, your sister, but I meant your Hermione," his father chuckled and Ron's gaze went back to the beautiful woman who had captured his head and heart for as long as he could remember. Ron didn't comment, but he could feel his father's eyes on him. "She's very special, that girl. Everything that she's accomplished, everything that she's doing now," his father shook his head in wonder. "I can only imagine what she'll do in the years to come."

"I wonder that myself sometimes," Ron said quietly, taking a sip of the champagne from the table.

"But what makes her so special, I'd say, is that she picked you." Ron choked on his drink and sputtered his response.

"Picking me? That's what makes her extraordinary, Dad. I have no idea why she's with me. It seems lately that all I do is bullocks things up so far that I can't see straight. It's a wonder she's still with me."

His father laughed heartily. "I thought that too when your mother and I began to date many moons ago. But, as time went by, I realized that she cared about me like how I cared about her."

"I know she cares for me Dad, I do, but, it feels so much like my heart will burst whenever she's around. She's all I think about when she's gone, and even when she's sitting right next to me."

"What makes you think things are going wrongly? You two always bicker. I'd almost say you're a replica of your dear mother and me."

Ron laughed at that for a moment, and then sobered when Hermione caught his gaze. She kept it briefly, but then turned back to Ginny, fixing a piece of her hair. "She's upset with me. I just wish I knew what I did wrong. What I said that would upset her so much."

Arthur placed a hand on his son's shoulder and squeezed. "Maybe it's what you haven't said to her, son."

"What am I supposed to say to her?" Ron asked as his father began to walk away.

"You'll figure it out my boy, you always do. Just remember there was a reason why she chose you. That's for her to know, and for you to continue doing. Good luck," he said and walked back into the house. Ron turned his attention back to where Hermione had stood previously, but Ginny's side was empty.

-

When Harry found Hermione she was upstairs in Ron's attic bedroom, staring out through the window. Hands in his pockets, he crept forward to his friend slowly. "He's going mad, you know," he murmured and Hermione nodded.

"I know."

"Ginny told me, Hermione, what you said earlier. I wish you had spoken to me about it."

"Harry I couldn't burden this with you. It was bad enough that I unloaded everything onto Ginny, the bride!" Hermione cried, tugging at the old throw blanket on the bed. Harry let her continue without interruption. "I'm not a very jealous person, Harry," she began and at his nod, she went on. "But I see the way you and Ginny look at each other and how everything's coming together for you two. You deserve it, one hundred percent. But I guess that…"

"You deserve it too, Hermione," Harry replied quietly.

"Yes, I think so. I just feel like I'm at a standstill for the moment, watching everything else pass me by."

Harry shook his head. "But you can't just look at this wedding. Hermione, you've done so much! You went back to school and got yourself a fantastic job within a month before graduating. You've been my best friend for years, and that's no easy feat. You have everything to be proud of."

Hermione wiped at her face and looked up sadly. "That's all well and good Harry, but, there's only one thing I've ever truly wanted."

"Ron." He said simply and she nodded. "He's yours, Hermione. You should know that by now! He would do anything for you, fight, die, what have you. What else could you need from him?"

"I need forever with him," she replied. Harry huffed a smile.

"There's no doubt in my mind that you'll get that, even if I have to make him propose."

"It's not the proposal I want exactly Harry. It's what it represents." Hermione began to pace the bedroom while Harry perched himself in her vacated seat. "I know he loves me. But it's not enough."

"Why not?" a third voice asked quietly and Hermione looked up shocked. Ron entered his childhood bedroom with his shoulders hunched. Hermione wanted to be angry for his interruption but from the way his face set about his sadness of her words, she couldn't grunge up her earlier anger.

"Ron, let me explain…" she began, walking towards him. Ron stood still but made no move otherwise.

"Explain what? Clearly you want me to shove off," he said sadly but very calm; like he had already accepted this fate.

"Shove you off? No, that's the last thing I want to do!" she cried, placing her hands on his forearms. He made no move to comfort her. Harry watched from his seat quietly, unsure of what to do; leave or stay.

"I'm clearly not making you happy Hermione. And your happiness means everything to me. And if I'm in the way of that, I'd hope I'd have enough dignity to back away and let you have what you deserve."

"Ron, please, you don't mean this," she sobbed, desperately trying to get her arms around him. He grabbed her arms and placed them at her sides. He looked down and smiled the saddest expression she'd ever seen.

"I love you 'Mione." With that, he placed a lingering kiss on her forehead and left the room without a sweeping glance. Hermione yelled out his name but before she could chase after him, her knees weakened and she was left a pile of tears on the floor. Harry went to her side slowly, kneeling down beside her trembling form and wrapped himself around her.

"It'll be okay," he shushed her, but Harry wasn't so sure of it himself.


	6. Part the Fifth B

TITLE: Five Firsts  
AUTHOR: ponderer  
SUMMARY: Five firsts with Ron and Hermione. Not the ones you may have thought of.  
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is it, folks! Sorry that it ends as it does, but sometimes I think the not so happy endings are what lead to reality's version of a happy ending. So, please, let me know what you think of this!

I wouldn't be writing if I didn't have such a supportive group of readers and reviewers. Even though you're silent, it means a lot to see so many hits on my work. It makes me feel really good about what I do and write. Truly and honestly, thank you, everyone.

I was asked to write another series with Five More Firsts, but I would need some ideas. So, feel free to say what you'd like to see if I care to make another part to this series!

So, now, go on, read and enjoy!

Five Firsts: Part the Fifth B

_The first break-up._

Harry sat huddled on the floor with Hermione for quite some time, letting her cry like never before; but it reminded him greatly of when Ron had left before. Except this time, it held a finality. Harry felt horrible for the woman who sat sobbing in his arms, and he knew he owed it to his other friend to comfort him in his time of need, but knew he was pressed to choose between the two.

Luckily, his future wife strode into the room.

"Harry? Hermione? What's going on?" she asked, hurrying to Hermione's free side. This brought on a new round of tears and Hermione quickly threw herself in the other girl's arms. "Oh sweetheart, everything will be fine," she consoled, rubbing her back. Hermione's fingers were clenched in Ginny's dress, and Harry could see the stress of the day taking over. Over Hermione's head, Ginny looked at Harry worriedly.

He mouthed her brother's name with a sad shrug of his shoulders and he watched as she sighed, bringing her arms tighter around Hermione. He pointed to the direction of the door and his fiancé nodded in understanding. He leaned down and kissed Hermione's head, squeezing her gently before making a quick exit. He knew Hermione would be fine in Ginny's care.

Harry looked through every door to find Ron but only found emptiness. He walked through the kitchen and went outside, passing family members he had yet to meet. He caught Arthur's eye and he wordlessly pointed in the direction of the small lake that he had often swum in as a teenager. Harry nodded and strode off to wear his best friend was sure to be hurting.

He found him staring off into the distance, his suit jacket lying beside him on the grass, his tie loose around his neck. Harry made his way through the cut grass, hearing the party behind him.

"Not now Harry," Ron murmured, not turning to face him. Harry ignored him and sat on the ground beside him.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said. Ron huffed, but said nothing else. "What happened up there Ron was Hermione being upset because of how much she loves you, not that she wants to end things. In fact, she wants to further things. She feels that you don't want to be with her forever." Ron turned to him with his mouth open in reply but Harry continued. "I know that you want that Ron, I do, but would it hurt you to mention it to her once in awhile?"

They sat in silence for a few comfortable moments, Ron finding solace in his best friend's company. "I want to marry her, I've known that forever. But she can't act this way every time she doesn't get her way right away. This is a two-way street here, and I can't just read every reaction she has and immediately know what's wrong. She needs to tell me these things."

Harry agreed with his friend, knowing how hard it was for Hermione to communicate sometimes. She was embarrassed, he was sure, and he felt sorry for her. Ron went on, "This time I'm not going back to her because I know I wasn't in the wrong. If she wants forever with me, she'll have to be the one that gets it because I just don't have the strength to go running for her again."

After a moment's pause he said, "Okay, Ron." Ron nodded looking back towards the water. Harry wasn't sure how long they sat there together, not saying anything, but he knew that Ron needed his company although he had earlier denied it. Finally, Harry clapped his friend on the back and made to stand up.

"I just want to say before tomorrow and everything, congratulations. I know you two will be extremely happy together," he said, still looking out at the water. Harry couldn't make himself smile but he nodded to Ron's back and made his way back to the house. Ron sighed and closed his eyes, a tear falling down his pale cheek.

-

Hermione was on autopilot the next morning, again dressing in Ginny's room that was full of tulle and lace. Mrs. Weasley cried at any opportunity but Hermione could see that Ginny was barely holding herself together so she knew she was going to have to stay strong, or at least pretend to be. The cherry on top of the cake was that the day was turning out to be absolutely beautiful for the time of year and everything was running smoothly. She had gotten almost no sleep the night before and was only running on the three cups of coffee Mr. Weasley had brewed downstairs early in the morning. His refusal to acknowledge her silent wallowing made her love for her second father grow. Before he left the room and their eye conversation ended, he clasped her tenderly on the shoulder and then exited, humming the Muggle Wedding March.

Back in Ginny's room, she had become the perfect Maid of Honor by going above and beyond her call of duty. She anticipated everything and anything Ginny would need for the day (including a bed sheet for privacy during restroom use) as well being perky and upbeat. She refused to allow her hurt over the previous night's woes affect Ginny and Harry's day in any way, shape, or form.

Ginny watched her friend through a careful eye, noting how Hermione was hiding any sort of emotion besides hopeless happiness for her best girlfriend. But, she also knew that trying to fix that could potentially ruin her wedding day and vowed to fix things once her own vows were made.

"Hermione, it's time to put her dress on," Mrs. Weasley said, breaking Hermione's thoughts. She nodded and smiled, helping her bring the lacey gown from its bag. Ginny lifted up her arms as her mother and maid of honor slipped the dress over her white slip, bringing it carefully past her updo hair and veil until it fell gracefully to the floor beneath her feet. Once again, Mrs. Weasley fell into a burst of tears at the sight of her only daughter. Hermione too felt tears in her eyes. Ginny watched her in hope.

"You look perfect," she murmured, the first honest smile gracing her face. Ginny's award winning grin lit up the room with a magnificence that made all three women glow to new heights. As they looked at Ginny's reflection in the long mirror, they all remembered the reason why they were there.

-

Ron stood next to Harry at the archway with the wizard who would be performing the ceremony. He watched as George sat his mother last, who looked like she hadn't stopped crying since Harry had proposed. He was extremely tense, awaiting the beautiful girl he longed to see, but at the same time, he wished he could flee. Ron looked at Harry's side profile, watching his friend eye the crowd nervously, but the music cued and he felt his stomach turn to knots.

She was simply breathtaking. Her dress wasn't her color exactly, but Hermione could have worn a paper bag and Ron would have thought she was gorgeous. Her eyes were downcast and she looked variably upset. He wanted nothing more to comfort her but also knew that he was tired of running back to her. He threw his shoulders into a better position and it coincidentally made Hermione look up and immediately meet his gaze.

He could read her like no other. She was obviously in pain; over exactly what he wasn't entirely sure. But she was hiding it well from everybody else, he could tell in the way her hands were holding too tightly to her small bouquet of white daises, and how she had her certain walk when something was bothering her. He knew her well enough to see past her mask, but it wasn't his job to correct her anymore. However, her pull was just as strong as it always was. The walk she had from the kitchen doorway to where he stood made the ceremony stop and it was only her and him. For a moment, he could almost pretend that it was their wedding and that she was walking to him, forever.

Hermione began to smile slightly and Ron's mind righted itself. He gave her a curt nod and then determinedly looked behind her, pretending not to see her sad look. She finished her journey and stood across from them as the crowd stood and Ginny made her grand appearance. Even though he was sure she was the most beautiful sister in this moment, all he could think about was what he was missing, and she wasn't standing more than a foot away.

-

Hermione sat beside her parents during the reception dinner, not really talking or eating. Her eyes were made to watch Ron, and she made sure she knew where he was the entire evening. He sat beside his parents and George near the head table, staring gloomily down at his own rather full plate. Although she was equally miserable, she felt a tad better that he was just as upset.

"It was a lovely ceremony, Hermione. You did wonderful in the planning," her mother commented. Hermione nodded and smiled shyly.

"Yes, everything worked out just fine," she said. Her mother grinned widely.

"And Ron looked as handsome as ever. He must be very busy keeping his family occupied, because he hasn't popped over to say hello," her father replied, taking a bite of his baked fish.

"Now now, he's practically a host tonight! I'm sure he'll say hello!" her mother explained.

"Yes," Hermione agreed, already thinking of a way to get them out of the Burrow as soon as they were done.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we would like to welcome Mr. and Mrs. Potter to the floor for their first dance as husband and wife," the DJ announced and everyone watched as the elegant newlyweds made their way to the dance floor. Hermione knew they had attended a few dance lessons in preparation; Harry's nerves had come back from fourth year. The song was slow and sweet with a waltz beat to it, as per Harry's only request.

"How beautiful," her mother murmured in her ear. Hermione couldn't reply, but felt a shiver run up her spine when she remembered what would happen next.

"Oh no," she whispered. She looked up and saw that Ron had been looking at her, and he too must have realized what was coming.

"The new couple would like their two best friends, Mr. Ron Weasley and Ms. Hermione Granger to the floor," the DJ announced and Hermione's jaw tightened. With a tense back, she watched as Ron stood stiffly and made his way to the floor. He watched her the entire way, daring her to not make a move. She nodded to herself, assuring that this had to happen for Ginny and Harry's sakes. She stood and met Ron.

For a moment, they stood staring at each other like they hadn't seen one another in years. She took in his face, which looked like it had gotten as much sleep as she had the night before, and the way his eyes expressed every feeling of sadness she had ever felt and more. He held out his left hand for her to take and she held a breath as their skin touched. It was electric the way it felt, and she watched him in wonder as he seemed to have felt it too. But, Ron was stronger in ways, and before she could say more, he already looked bored.

They began to dance stiffly and not as close as she liked, but she could still smell his tantalizing scent, the cologne that she had bought him for his last birthday. She breathed it in, bringing herself closer without noticing. His embrace was cold and hesitant, but she didn't care. She rested her head on his chest for she hadn't been able to reach his shoulders in years. She took another deep breath, wishing for the courage to say all the things she needed and wanted to say. Within moments, his arm around her waist relaxed, pulling her more into their usual dancing position. She tightened her fingers in his palm, feeling him breathe a kiss into her hair.

"You look beautiful," he murmured. She gasped as she felt his mouth hover over her ear and she dared a glance at him. He looked so honest and hurt that she wanted to hold on and never let go.

"Ron, please, let's talk about…" she started but he shook his head.

"No, not here," he said so sternly that she closed her mouth abruptly. She nodded instead in reply and he accepted it with a cursory glance around the dance floor, his family watching their heated eye war.

"Then when?" she murmured, staring at a place beyond his shoulder, afraid to meet his gaze.

"I'm not sure," he replied, making a show of twirling her around until she felt breathless. Usually when he did this at parties, he'd kiss her as he brought her back into his arms, and she raised herself up automatically and felt shunned when he turned his cheek. Hermione's chin trembled and she closed her eyes, hoping to not start a show. Ron looked down at her and leaned his down close for her to hear. "I just need time."

"Time?" she asked, tears in her eyes.

"God, please don't cry," he cried, wiping a stray tear off her cheek.

"Then don't say you need time. I want to be with you Ron. Don't ever doubt that!" she exclaimed.

Ron looked down at his shoes. "I don't know what to think anymore."

"Yes you do! Tell me that you love me as much as I love you. Tell me that you only want to be with me until we're fighting over which breakfast cereal is more important for our grandchildren to eat! Tell me that you can't live without me!" she cried urgently, grasping onto his suit jacket.

"I can't say that right now," he began and Hermione's face started to crumble. "I do love you Hermione and I do want forever with you, but I need time to figure things out. Please respect that," he urged.

"I hate time! We're wasting time!" she said but he shook his head again. "Ron, please don't do this to me, to us," she pleaded as the song came to a close and they stopped moving but his arm was still around her. He let his finger run down her cheek, flushed. She closed her eyes to relish in the feeling.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. She gasped as she felt his lips brush her cheek once, then another time, and when she opened her eyes again, he was gone.


End file.
